May 21, 2008

What's wrong with America 

-----Original Message-----
From: Marathon Petroleum Company and SuperAmerica Gas Stations
Sent: March 27, 2008 11:05 AM
To: All criminals
Subject: FREE MONEY!

To whom it may concern,
We would like to inform you of our willingness to FUND YOUR CRIMINAL
ENTERPRISE! We have a ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY when it comes to our
employees attempts to interfere with your personal initiative at
redistribution of wealth. We want to make sure that there's NO
CONFUSION: OUR money is actually YOUR money, and we here at Marathon
Petroleum and SuperAmerica are very sorry that some FORMER employees
hindered your efforts. We will be more than happy to supply legal
services for you - free of charge, naturally - if you should ever wish
to bring legal action against any of our FORMER employees who may have
caused you any pain, anguish, or suffering. Please accept our sincerest
apologies and feel free to return to our stations again whenever you'd
like some more of our - OOPS! - YOUR money!

The Marathon Petroleum/SuperAmerica Team

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