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Jan 30, 2004
|Oh GOD... I cannot stop laughing..... Allah has absolutely outdone himself.
This is the best Dean-o yet.
Drink alert is in full effect. Remove all liquids from your mouths.... your hands.... possibly even the room. Holy crap....
I'm still laughing.
Jan 29, 2004
|Gotta know when to hold 'em, and know when to fold 'em.
GruntDoc has the story behind this extremely fortunate Falcon driver.
|I've seen various versions of this passed around for years, but Blackfive has the latest rendition of how to prepare for the Big CAX.
And for today's short lesson in Marinespeak, click the following link if you don't know what CAX is. Then you'll understand why Iraq is the "Big" one.
Jan 27, 2004
|Thanks to Deuddersun for leaving this link in the comments: http://www.vampirebat.com/war/
Mmmmm.... 'sploshuns..... This guy has the long version of the Apache gunship video I linked before. In this one, you can see the bad guys trying to ditch their weapons. "What, me? Shoot at Americans? Never. Nope. Wasn't me. No weapons here. Nothing to see. Move along....."
I especially recommend the AC-130 video from Afghanistan. Engaing individual members of Al-Qaeda with an airborne 105mm howitzer might be overkill. But who cares.......hehehehehehe..........
Don't forget that Grouchy has new videos up as well. He didn't make these himself - in fact, I saw the F-18 one at least a couple years ago - but they're still pretty cool.
|Once again proving that he's all about free speech, unless it's YOURS....
AL FRANKEN KNOCKS DOWN DEAN HECKLEREven though it's the notably conservative NY Post giving us the story, we can already see liberal media bias...... they called him "funny."
The tussle left Franken's trademark thick-rim glasses broken, but he said he was not injured.Damn....
Franken - who seemed in a state of shock and out of breath after the incident - was helped back to his feet by several people who watched the tussle. Police arrived soon after.Thank Christ he didn't have a baseball bat or a powerdrill handy. Hey, the mob and the IRA have been kneecapping people for years, and have it down to a science. Seems Franken hasn't evolved from the ol' caveman tackle, though.
Franken said he's not backing Dean but merely wanted to protect the right of people to speak freely. "I would have done it if he was a Dean supporter at a Kerry rally," he said.But it's ok to go "rodeo" on somebody and bulldog 'em if they're the one doing the shouting.
The trouble started when several supporters of fringe presidential candidate Lyndon Larouche began shouting accusations at Dean.C'mon guys can't we all just get along? I mean, all our little red books were written by the same guy. Well, if you can count on anybody's supporters to be more faithful than the "Deaniacs," it would be Larouche's people. He's only run for president in every election since 1976.... no really, I looked it up.
Franken emerged from the crowd and charged one male protester, grabbing him with a bear hug from behind and slamming him onto the floor.__________________________________________________
Good to see that the Constitution was once again upheld by Al Franken. You can't just let those Jackbooted Thugs of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy (when did Larouche join the VRWC?) keep talking! You have to wrestle them to the ground so that by shutting them up, everyone can enjoy free speech. Confused yet?
I wonder if the guy will press charges. I wonder if Al Franken will get thrown in jail for assault. And most importantly, I wonder if Al will look into the gathered mass of TV cameras that will be waiting for him when he posts bail and claim that the tackling dummy has infringed on his right to free speech.
But if this event spawns a new Constitutional Amendment that guarantees the Right to Random Clotheslining of people, I'm all for it.
Jan 24, 2004
|From Joe Cartoon. Make sure you watch the whole thing, and push the button! Repeatedly!
hat tip: Doc Russia
Jan 23, 2004
|Mmmmmm.... Guinness. But sadly that was the last one. Hafta switch to Red Stripe now, before finishing off the rum. I love Friday........
Well, I promised to give up the Mojo if somebody could answer where the title of the last post came from. Rob got that it came from Contra. Then Dumass got that it was the cheat code that gave you 30 lives. As aggravated as I am that the one guy here who has already sampled my Mojo recipe is the same guy who got the question right, I promised that if SOMEBODY could answer it, I would tell all. So I shall. But first, story time.
I used to spend quite a bit of time over at R Lee Ermey's Mail Call site, and still drop by there on occasion. Anyway, one day I got into a discussion with a couple old Navy guys about the Philippiness and in particular the old Navy base at Subic Bay/Cubi Point. See, I've never been there and the likelihood of ever going dropped significantly when the US moved out in the early 90's. But I don't feel too bad. I heard all the really good times out there were during the 'Nam (I heard John Kerry went there once......). If the place had calmed down and wasn't going to surpass what I'd seen in Flight of the Intruder (and read - the bar scene is better in the book) I wasn't interested.
So, like most conversations between Squids and Jarheads, up came the topic of booze. We got to talking about the bars outside the front gate in Olongapo City. I laid hands on two different recipes for some "Po City" Mojo, and tried both. The only differences were one had bourbon and the other had lime juice. I preferred the pitcher I made with both, but let your own liver be your guide.
Pour the following into a large pitcher over crushed ice:
1 bottle of beer (San Miguel for authenticity if you can find it, but Bud will do)
This thing is noooooo joke. Couple glasses of this, and you will be howling at the moon quite well. Like I said before - heed the warning.
Happy weekend everybody!
Jan 22, 2004
found at Heather's
And since I'm in a contest mood (and Dumass was so quick on the trigger - you tard), NOBODY gets Mojo until somebody tells me where the title of this post came from and what it means.
|As has been previously established, Friday is the Corps' unofficial booze night (or maybe it's just MY official booze night..... I get those two confused). So because it's Thursday, I am - at present - not imbibing an adult beverage. However, I see NO reason that I can't TALK about booze.
Yesterday, Harvey accused Matt of joining the Russian army to go on a beer rescue mission. I'm happy to report that those kegs aren't dead soldiers..... yet.
Russian army rescues kegs of beer
Russian troops have retrieved 10 tonnes of beer trapped under the Siberian ice after a week-long operation.
Gotta have priorities. Trucks are replaceable, but EVERY DROP of beer is precious.
Next up, the Bartender is a rat bastard. After commenting that I felt I was more than qualified for the "Bender Badge" in his Above and Beyond drinking awards series, he went and pinned it on somebody else. I'd quit going to Willie's place, but for his quality drink recipes. Curse you and your tasty beverages Bartender! CURSE YOU!!
On the topic of drink recipes, I promised a virtual shot to anyone that could ID a movie quote I left in Willie's comments. So far, only Eric has taken a stab at it, but the first person to come up with it will receive an ACTUAL drink recipe from me for some Philippine Islands Subic Bay MOJO. Or I may just post it for all to see out of the goodness of my own heart. But somebody better answer that question, or it's no
And finally, Jim Breuer (Saturday Night Live's "Goat Boy" - but if that's all you know him from, you're missing out) relates what's really going on in your stomach when you party hard. This is not to be missed. Or ignored. Heed his sage advice.
UPDATE: The MOJO contest is now closed. The quote is from "Air America" and was correctly identified by my buddy Dumass. Dude - that's hardly fair. You've already had the Mojo. Hell, I MADE IT FOR YA! Everybody else, tune in tomorrow for that recipe. Hey, I gotta keep people interested somehow!
Jan 21, 2004
|Check it out - a whole story inspired by the fact that an airplane flew over some people and was loud..... how news worthy. At least the opportunity wasn't squandered by ABC to point out how much Israel sucks.....
Israeli warplane overflies south Lebanon
We can't report anything if those guys don't blow up some
The overflight came after a flare-up of violence that started with Israeli violations of Lebanese airspace on Monday that drew anti-aircraft fire from Lebanese Shiite Hezbollah guerrillas and UN condemnation.
See what THEY started?! Damn those uppity JOOOS! Who do they think they are, running around killing
Hezbollah guerrillas later the same day destroyed an Israeli military bulldozer that UN peacekeepers in the region said had violated Lebanese territory, a charge denied by Israel.
Well, at least those UN guys were on the ball. Good to see they "kept the peace" and allowed Hezbollah to destroy that bulldozer. Future IHOP breakfasts will be put on hold until the Israelis can get another CAT up and running.
The rocket attack, which left one Israeli soldier killed and another wounded, triggered Israeli air strikes on two abandoned bases in southern Lebanon. No casualties were reported in the strikes.
See? All is well. One bulldozer destroyed, one Israeli dead, one wounded, and all that was destroyed was a camel hitching post at an empty "Martyr's Dating Service" (where you can hand-pick your own set of 72 virgins). Ahhhhhh...... all is right with the world.
Anybody else hope that when that jet went over, some bad guys wet themselves? You can bet that they're all familiar with air power by now. Hey, didn't we sell the Israelis some Apaches?
(Warning: do not click link unless you want to see terrorist's body parts go flying - seriously)
|You've all seen Dean-o lose his mind, but have you heard the remix?
Hat tip to commenter dviant at Frank J's place (PS - click Frank to read his latest Chomps story!)
UPDATE: The Most Exalted Allah is at it again.
|Rachel Lucas, she of the dog pictures, WWII historical lessons, and savage eviscerations of all things stupid, shall blog no more........ kinda. She wasn't really doing much lately anyway - like 5 posts since Thanksgiving. But she has finally admitted that she's hung up her keyboard, and will only return on the rarest of occasions. I was really looking forward to a thorough review of the State of the Union and Howard Dean's now world famous "Yeagh!" Oh well. Fortunately, she's not taking down the blog, so at least we'll have her archives to rummage through.
Thanks for the memories, Rachel.
Jan 20, 2004
|Misha wrote up an excellent short post this morning which pointed to an even more excellent post by Kim du Toit. The question posed was this: you can practice all you like, but how do you prepare for the possibility of having to shoot/kill someone who is threatening you or your loved ones? A good question, to be sure, and fielded quite handily by the well armed |
No sooner had I read this, then into my inbox popped THIS gem. Fate? Karma? I report - you decide.
Jan 19, 2004
|After watching her disassemble idiots at a sub-atomic level for months over at Misha's place, I'm happy to report that Natasha has open up her own House of Clue. I expect great things from the "Imperial Princess of Pistol Whippings" (a title I suggested..... damn I'm proud) and she is now linked, no questions asked.
I foresee a great many times I will simply point you to her, because she'll have said whatever the heck it was that I wanted to say, only MUCH better..... and probably much more profanely. Welcome, Natasha!
Jan 18, 2004
|This one's for you, Matt (and Jennifer too, historically speaking).
From Stephen Ambrose's excellent Americans at War, detailing a conversation between Generals Eisenhower and Marshall after Ike had an argument with de Gaulle:
"The French continue to be difficult," he complained to Marshall. "I must say that next to the weather I think they have caused me more trouble in this war than any other single factor." Thinking all the way back to the darkest days of December 1941 and putting the French in perspective, he added, " They even rank above landing craft."
|I dedicate this week's vote to K-K-K-Ken.
I think that the "Insurgency in Iraq" post from American Amnesia is great (permalinks aren't working - scroll down to Jan 13). This is - get ready - an intelligent post by someone who opposed the war. I can respect people who call out America on it's shortcomings, as long as they applaud her for her brilliance and her constant strive for improvement. Go read it Kenny. And then tell those guys how they're too conservative and should be put to death.
Ken says: Conservativo delenda est!
Jan 15, 2004
|And just like that - POOF - he's gone. Banished back to the depths of whatever depraved little universe he inhabits, Ken shall no more darken my door. After calling Mad Mikey a rapist (of his own daughter, no less) and then saying that it would be a good idea to kill all the conservatives in the US in order to save America, Ken's dissent has officially been stifled by me - at least around here.
As a result, Ken will proudly be the first person to grace my new "Dissenters Stifled" toteboard on the sidebar, which will link back to this post. Hopefully, I will be able to stifle countless more dissenters that decide to come here for all their quashing needs. Thanks Ken, you've made my day!
UPDATE 16 Jan 2004: Well, well, well. That didn't take long - just under 19 hours. So desperate was our little Bob/Ken/Alan to screech at me once again, he made his way to another computer and was good enough to label me a Nazi. Oh, that and say that there would be nothing he'd like more than to see me dead. That's right........ K-k-k-ken is coming to k-k-k-kill me.
Rookie mistake on my part - I'd just banned his single IP hoping that would be enough. But every moonbat needs to be heard, much like a two year old child with a dirty diaper, so back he came. I have now gone the full measure and banned his whole IP block (the Ken block is 66.213.21.# and the Alan block is 66.213.13.#). If you happen to be sane and are in that block, sorry, but Alan has ruined it for you - do you really think that the good folks at the Ohio Public Library in Columbus appreciate people using their computers in such a manner? I'm almost positive that he'll find another 'puter to broadcast his banshee-like wailing from, and I'll be more than happy to ban those too. No "debating" for you Alan. I refuse to provide a platform for someone who endorses pedophilia, accuses people of raping their own children, and advocates a second holocaust. I said it before, and I'll say it again - if you don't like it, you can KISS MY AMERICAN ASS.
PS - You have the right to free speech just as much as I have the right to not listen. So, if you want to talk, say it somewhere else and I'll be more than happy to not listen to you there as well.
|J at Quibbles N Bits paints for us a picture of what Howard Dean will look like in hell, while Allah uses photoshop, not paint.
Praise be to them both!
Jan 14, 2004
|Or Bob... or whoever the hell he says he is. Damned if he didn't ooze over from wherever he last polluted (I'm lookin' at you Mikey.) A couple days ago I asked if he was a troll. His return would indicate he, in fact, is.
Go look at the funny monkey fling his poo, and feel free to fling it right back where it came from.
Jan 13, 2004
|A commenter by the handle of Yellowlegs told Doc Russia the answer, and it's posted at Bloodletting. THIS IS A MUST READ.|
|I follow entirely too many links back to their sources. Resistance is futile. I have proof:
28.571428571428573% of me is a huge nerd! How about you?
The Nerd Test was passed to me by GOD, creator of all things. The blog (Ludicrous Speed....... a name which is wonderfully nerdy in and of itself) featuring the Nerd Test also has a post on a great film, Eqilibrium. Frank J actually talked about that one a few months back, and as a result I rented and later purchased it. Imagine a movie with Matrix-like action, but Neo's line is "I know Gun-fu." Like the Matrix, no one can really be told about it.... you must see it for yourself.
Anyway, get to clickin'. If anybody breaks 50% on that quiz, you are a supergeek. Don't sit next to me in the cafeteria anymore, and stop trying to have your Class 11 Wizard cast a spell on me. I don't want to play my "Holy Water" card and burn up all my Manna to crush you, but I will if it comes to that.....
(those of you who don't understand the above statement, don't worry - that means you're normal)
Jan 12, 2004
|The Bartender has seen fit to give me an award. Happily, my commando skills have allowed me to evade capture, thusfar.|
|Well, two actually. I only post these cuz I'm a movie junkie. These two confirm what many have suspected:
I am filled with a rage that simmers just below the surface.
Congratulations! You're Merry!
Which Lord of the Rings character and personality problem are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla
Jan 11, 2004
|As an addendum to my Green Side Out post from Friday, I offer Grim's warning to Marines about to rotate to the combat zone.
Islamist website 1924.org has picked up that super-edited CNN clip called "US Marines Execute an Iraqi to the Cheers of Fellow Marines."
The link he provided didn't work for me, but I found the video here. Unsurprisingly, the video was shot by those paragons of journalistic virtue at CNN, who are well renowned for not giving us the whole story.
Keeping Susie Happy
|CNN has pictures of Chinese tests of the hand held version of their mind control laser. It's only a matter of time before they put one in space!
In a related story, tinfoil stocks went through the roof today.......
Jan 10, 2004
|Latest version of Marine Corps’ amphibious fighting vehicles goes further, faster
The new vehicle, formerly known as the Advanced Assault Amphibious Vehicle, was recently renamed the Expeditionary Fighting Vehicle.
It's been advertised that these things cut through the waves so fast, you can ski behind them. Not bad, considering that what we have now will only do 8 mph through the water.
Jan 9, 2004
|CD beats the daylights out of Democratic Undergound's Bushitler argument. It practically self-fisks, but he sure helped it along!|
|I just came across this post from Kevin at the Primary Main Objective. He's got some intel that the boys from 1stMARDIV will be going to Iraq in green uniforms when the 82nd Airborne rotates out. This is intended to be a psyche job on the Iraqis - let 'em know there's a new sheriff in town. I'm hoping it works as well as it did for us in Somalia. There, the Marines had not been issued the desert tan boots that the Army had. After a few firefights, the Somalis thought it better to just leave the guys with the black boots alone.
This is something that Marines have employed for years:
"Do not attack the First Marine Division. Leave the yellowlegs alone. Strike the American Army"
By the way, unless some people are really up on their Marine Corps history, I'm willing to bet that Deuddersun is the only person here who recognizes the significance of this post's title.
|Well, it's Friday in the Corps, and you all know what THAT means. So I'm going to head over here order up some of this and maybe chase it with one of those. And after I've had a couple three of those, I might reach for one of these, which has been known on occasion to make me act like this. You only really have to worry about me if I start doing THESE. Then it'll be projectile time, Exorcist style, and you'll have to put me in front of one of these if you want to keep the floors clean.
The next morning, I'll wake up and down handfuls of these. I'm sure that some of you guys can attest to their healing powers, especially the 800mg versions that military docs pass out like candy. And then I'll spend the weekend recuperating with my Christmas present.
Drinks are on me, everybody. I'll be in my usual chair. See ya there!
Jan 8, 2004
|I guess so - which would make him my first - but the entry was so short and pointless, it's hard to tell. Oh wait...... that's what trolls do, isn't it?
From the comments of my History post:
Actually Bush is similar to Hitler in that they both launched unprovoked wars of aggression. Poland, for example, did not attack Germany. Neither did Iraq attack the US.
We'll ignore the fact that you compared Bush to himself in the last sentence, and just assume that
In August 1939, a group of concentration camp prisoners were dressed in Polish uniforms, shot and then placed just inside the German border. Adolf Hitler claimed that Poland was attempting to invade Germany. On 1st September, 1939, the German Army was ordered into Poland.
Oh wait, that would require Bush to have a "concentration camp" to go to for fake Iraqis. Well, he could have used the guys down in Gitmo I suppose..... oh well. No point in being a Monday morning quarterback with these things.
And I guess that UN Resolution 1441 was just like the Munich Agreement, wasn't it?. I mean they were BOTH international resolutions that allowed one country to invade another, right? Except that one was telling a brutal dictator to cease and desist, and the other told a brutal dictator that he could own half of a country that wasn't his. Hmmm...... so confusing.
It's nice to know that some people are so blind to history that they're doomed to repeat it. It makes them predictable. Did this guy even read UPDATE 2 before he posted?
Jan 7, 2004
found via Bane
UPDATE: Family portrait. That's me in the middle, next to dad. Back home they just call me Michael.
Jan 6, 2004
Jan 5, 2004
|It seems that it’s all the rage today to compare President Bush to Adolph Hitler. As we all know by now, the good, kind-hearted folks at MoveOn.org are practically making a living by doing it. I’d link you, but I’ll be damned if I’ll give them even ONE hit.
Seems like everyone wants to compare the world of today – it’s leaders and it’s war – to the world of World War II. I am not left out of this group – I’ve compared Osama and Saddam to Tojo and Hitler (but only in terms of their low IQ’s and military ineptness).
I know it’s been done before, but let’s paint a picture here, shall we? We’ll hold them up side by side. Ready?
Bush – Won a hotly contested election in which the Supreme Court enforced standing voting laws in Florida. Has tried to legally appoint judges to Circuit Court positions but has been thwarted at every turn by the minority party. Has NOT circumvented the law to accomplish anything.
Hitler – Became supreme ruler without an election, due to declaration of police state because of things such as the hotly burning embers of the Reichstag fire – which was set by Nazis. Afterwards, local Nazi organizations instigated disorder…… which was then quelled by replacing the elected state government with appointed Nazi Reich Commissioners.
Saddam – Rose to the office of Vice President of Iraq because he was appointed to it by his cousin, the President. Wielded power behind the scenes until he tired of being second fiddle and forced his cousin to resign. There were never any hotly contested elections – Saddam won them all by an impossible margin of better than 99%.
Bush – Has passed health care bills and has created economic growth through tax cuts. His America is currently detaining less than 1000 people who are suspected terrorists or enemies of the nation and may possess information on the whereabouts or plans of other terrorists.
Hitler – Passed resolutions to purge his whole country, and eventually the entire planet, of Jews, Poles, Russians, and essentially anyone who did not LOOK Aryan. His Germany detained and killed millions of people simply for not being German, or sometimes, for not being German enough.
Saddam – Passed few resolutions at all. Ruled the land through random acts of violence against whomever he felt like abusing. Killed his own people in the hundreds of thousands. Attacked Kuwait, killing thousands. Prior to that went to war with Iran, killing as many as a million.
I could go on about social programs and state powers, but lets face it – President Bush has yet to create anything as diabolical as the “Bush Jugen,” and if he can’t get God back into the classroom, then he’s a long way from having a smiling picture of “Uncle W.” hanging over the blackboards of every school. I think it’s fair to say that the President and Hitler are so far removed from each other that the Mars lander is closer to Adolph than he is. The comparisons between Hitler and Saddam are far too numerous to list, but include participation in attempted coups, imprisonment, and murder. Mein Kampf is reportedly one of Saddam’s favorite books.
You want to compare WARS? Alright, let me break this into a bite size chunk for you. I’ll hold up our current fight in Iraq against just one BATTLE from WWII.
Iraq – 2862 (482 killed)
Iwo Jima – 26038 (6821 killed)
Iraq – 277 (9.5 months)
Iwo Jima – 36
Length Iraq war will have to be (at current casualty rates) to equal number of dead at Iwo Jima: 10 years, 9 months
Iraq – approx. 168,000 sq miles
Baghdad - approx. 1,544 sq miles
Iwo Jima – 8 sq miles
Let’s not forget that while the fighting at Iwo was particularly bloody it was also fairly straightforward. Yes, there were caves and pillboxes and booby traps. But anyone you saw was an enemy. It moved – it died. There were no city streets, no possible innocents mixed in with the valid targets, no reason to put your own life at further risk by holding your fire. In Iraq, we face those problems. And we are doing an outstanding job.
So to all those who wish to continue to compare today to WWII and call our President a Nazi, and call this war a quagmire – please, by all means, continue to dig that hole of yours a little deeper. History speaks volumes, and right now it’s drowning you out.
UPDATE: Go to Grim's Hall for more On War and those who are unfamiliar with history.
UPDATE 2: When I titled this entry I was sure I'd seen it used before, and I was right. Bill Whittle's History is a far superior read to the stuff I put up above. It's nine months old, but like ALL his stuff it still applies. You want a history lesson?
This war is an abject and utter failure. What everyone thought would be a quick, decisive victory has turned into an embarrassing series of reversals. The enemy, -- a ragtag, badly-fed collection of hotheads and fanatics – has failed to be shocked and awed by the most magnificent military machine ever fielded. Their dogged resistance has shown us the futility of the idea that a nation of millions could ever be subjugated and administered, no matter what obscene price we are willing to pay in blood and money.
Jan 4, 2004
|Jeez Susie, layoff will ya......
My vote: Banning Smokers, from Self-Composed
There Suz - ya happy now? :P
Jan 3, 2004
|I, like General MacArthur, have returned - although him setting foot back in the Philippines and me coming back to the blog aren't even remotely the same. But still, here I am.
I hope everyone had a joyous Christmas and New Year's and that 2004 brings all of us our best days ever. I'd REALLLY like to thank Deuddersun, who basically turned the comments section into 'Marine Corps trivial pursuit' and everyone else who used this space as a sounding board. Make sure you stop on by D's place at anywhichway.net to see a view point somewhat removed from my own, but an AMERICAN viewpoint, nonetheless. Ooh-rah, yut, aroogha, and thanks to everyone.